Jack Sparrow Channel No.5

If you've seen the hilariously bad Brad Pitt advert for Channel No.5 then you ought to appreciate this. It's not really Brad's fault, all perfume adverts are pretentious and stupid. It's a fundamental law of nature.

If you were wondering what kind of retarded butt goblin would play this steaming pile of motion controlled bullcrap, here's your answer. The Man who made the Kessel run in under 12 parsecs.

Taking the form of an educational video for non-human space travellers, the video reveals the intimidating nature of the human race—we’re quite a scary bunch, especially before breakfast.

He might not look like much, but this Florida soft shelled turtle has got lightning fast reflexes! He's obviously in preparation for the Indy 500. The only thing missing was a puff of smoke in the shape of a turtle as he ran off!

If at first your tractor doesn't succeed, try again and fail some more until you get something fail-worthy to post on the internet and amuse us all - OUCH!

If you were wondering why anyone would want to buy a micro car, then just take a look at these clowns (not literally clowns) driving around the centre of Amsterdam and you'll instantly see why.

If you’ve been on the internet, you’re probably a fan of Ken Block’s awesome Gymkhana videos. But you’ve probably never seen it done like this before, with a go-kart and a gorilla and a ladder.

This has to be a once in a life time thing. The clock is about to run out and you take a behind, over the head shot. It goes in and wins you the game. Just think how many school girl chicks are going to want to blow him tonight!

It really looks like standards have been slipping on this hit cooking program - Still the proof is in the pudding – I’m sure these freaks of fine cusine have something ’special’ on offer to tease our tastebuds?

There's a multitude of videos out there on the internet of people being knocked out but I can guarantee that this isn't a method you will have seen before. My only guess is that this guy has narcalepsy.

Gotta love the guys reaction in the background. Stops in his tracks to watch this chick show off her talent